The Southwest Coast Path. Books have been written about it, films have been made, documentaries have been put out and numerous guides line the shelves of any good travel shops.

So with all this research available to me I did what I do best. Look at absolutely none of it and immediately fuck something up.

Started at the sodding end of the thing.

Ah well, you can’t always be perfect I guess.

Even after that instant blunder I was still in high hopes. I’ve been wanting to make a start on this one for a while and the stars have aligned, well……….for a week at least, where I have no responsibilities or commitments to get in the way of me doing something that immediately reminds me how unfit I am.

To be fair I’m a 40 year old bloke with no pets or kids that lives in a van. Responsibilities and commitments are not usually a problem so I don’t really have much of an excuse for the past year and a half of not walking.

Actually, yes I do.
I couldn’t be arsed.

30 seconds in to my walk I was greeted with this.

I’ve always thought that the only way a beautiful beach walk can be improved is by adding the element of a possible suprise penis.
Fortunately for me I only glimpsed about four. Still, four more than I’ve seen in the past year though!

The path was along the beach which, I’ll be honest, was not the nicest way to be eased into your next mammoth walk. Walking through the soft sand with a backpack is challenging. The most annoying part was I couldn’t walk fast enough to overtake a couple of 90 year old nudists walking ahead of me. Not my favourite kilometer I’ve done today I must admit.

As I stared into the distance I could see a cool looking natural bridge thing. It was hard to see but I knew that, at some point today, I would be standing next to it.

That’s the surreal thing about coastal walks. You can look back and in the distance, obscured by humidity, there is a cliff you would have been walking along.

It’s an unusual feeling and gives you a sense of accomplishment, even if it has taken you a week.

Here it is when I finally got close to it.

The next part from here would take me to Swanage.

The whole route was quite busy but Swanage was on another level.
There were so many people it looked like a Where’s Wally picture. The lifeguards looked stressed.
I also saw an old school Punch and Judy show being acted out of a little hut. There was a big sign saying “adults and children – £2”
It wasn’t fenced off though so in the spirit of things I leant on the railings and watched for free.

Then I spent a week’s wages here.

I had a campsite in mind near Swanage that I was going to head to. I did a quick check and realised it had two reviews. One 5 star review and one 1 star review.

I found another campsite further on but it would add another 6km to my walk.
I felt okay at the time so I thought I would give it a go.

Bit of a mistake.

I started getting pain at the back and top of my left leg about 3km in and it did not ease off. As beautiful as the path was I don’t think I fully appreciated it because it felt like my groin was going to fall off.

Don’t worry, I won’t deny you the views dear reader.

I struggled on and made it to the newly chosen campsite. True to form I hadn’t booked but the lovely lady saw me come in and said “you look really happy to be here”
I thought I was hiding my pain quite well but obviously not!

After setting up my tent and drinking the 4 liters of water I’d forgotten to drink throughout the day I made myself a bit of grub on my, far to close to the tent, burner and relaxed like I haven’t relaxed for……..well, a year and a half!!!!

Anyway, I am absolutely shattered and I need to sleep.

BUEN CA……….nope, wrong one.

BUEN SOUTH COAST WEST PATH
(Or something along them lines)